Tuesday, August 23, 2011

So, I Survived

So, I survived, EastCoastEarthQuake and all.

I've been having some difficulties lately. Not something I can really put on my FB or write specifically about in Blog. Just know that I am surviving, am not sure for how long. I don't know what the end is or where or how far away.

It's not Hubs related, family related, kiddos related. 

It's ugh related. It's questioning myself, my ethics, my abilities, my judgement, my style. I feel as though I don't measure up to expectations and I have no idea how to play the game. I think it's a game anyway.

I know I am better than this, more experienced in this and more respected in this... in some eyes. Unfortunately, they're not the right sets of eyes. So for now, I guess it's a waiting game, or a puppet game. I'm not really sure. I am trying everyday to stay true to who I am and not let it get me down but it is harder and harder to fake it everyday. This is me. This is how I've succeeded thus far and this is how I want to continue. a

What's a girl to do but trudge on and then... I get to hug my kiddos.

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